I’ve been down a rabbit hole most of the day today—watching everything from funny animal videos to paranormal stories, positive affirmations, disasters, and so much more. I allowed myself to fall into the quicksand trap of mindless videos. It wouldn’t be so bad, except I have goals and a deadline to meet.
Spending several hours watching videos is not productive. It can be informative at times and might even inspire some ideas—like the Dogman in my book—but for the most part, today’s rabbit hole didn’t produce anything other than an example of procrastination. Unfortunately, I seem to be an expert at that—not just when it comes to avoiding things I love, like writing or art, but also when it comes to exercising, cleaning the house, or going somewhere when I don’t feel like driving.
Procrastination is my nemesis.
When I get into these types of funks, I really have to be diligent and catch myself—otherwise, the rabbit hole turns into a deeper rat hole (darker, messier, and harder to escape).
So, what am I to do?
- Take note of when I first trip or stumble.
- Recognize when I start watching one video after another — am I able to turn them off and start on whatever project I’ve been avoiding?
- Track how long my bout of procrastination lasts—hours, days, weeks?
For the most part, I can catch myself within a decent amount of time. For the most part. There was a time not that long ago when I was stuck in a self-created procrastination hole—well, more like a crater. It lasted almost a year. I didn’t completely stop writing, creating art, or doing other things, but I was doing the bare minimum.
Why? I’m not 100% sure, but I think part of it was fear, along with feeling like an imposter. Even though I knew these feelings were self-created, they still felt very real. And it doesn’t matter whether someone else is the cause or you do it to yourself—it’s still destructive.
So many people miss out on dreams, desires, and happiness because of fear. And I believe imposter syndrome is just another branch of that fear. It sneaks in right when you start getting excited about bringing your dreams to life.
When I first wrote The Moody Dragon With No Name, I went full gung-ho, barely listening to the little negative voice whispering in my ear. But unfortunately, the more I write, draw, paint, or work with my favorite (and very messy) medium—charcoal—that whisper grows louder, filling my head with doubts: You’re not a real writer. Your art isn’t good enough. Even a monkey could do better.
Do I believe that voice? Not really. But I have to work at not believing it. Some days, it’s easy. Other days… not so much. And on those days, I often find myself tumbling down the proverbial YouTube/movie/audiobook/book rabbit hole. Not all the videos are bad—some are research—but when they take time away from my dreams and goals, that’s time I could, should, and want to be spending on writing or creating art.
So tonight, I’m sharing my struggle with that negative voice—and the fact that it can be tuned out. Does it ever go away completely? I rather hope not.
Why?
Because that voice keeps me honest. It keeps me on my toes.
If you ever deal with negative voices—use them to your benefit. Don’t let them take the upper hand.
You got this.
And above all, remember—You are not alone!
Till next time, may your days be filled with love, laughter, hugs, and blessings.🌻
We are Creatively Unlimited! 
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