~ In a Funk ~

Recently my boyfriend shared a video with me regarding laziness, boredom, and procrastination. I started watching the video and the narrator was talking about laziness, procrastination, self-doubt, being unmotivated and of course my mind chatter kicked in and immediately started in- “is he calling me …,?” “I’m not either …!” No, he wasn’t, he was not calling me lazy, or anything else my negative voice was saying. He was trying to be helpful. And as I watched I realized that the lesson being taught was sadly on target. I have called myself lazy recently, I have had self-doubt for years (I hid it well) and yes I procrastinate. For almost a month I’ve been saying I’m in a funk, since I resigned from a job I liked. I’m not sorry I resigned, I had good reasons, but I did enjoy my job and the flexibility it gave for me to complete school work while there. I liked my co-workers and the money was OK. But it also provided me with an excuse. Between the drive to and from and the hours there, and school, well I didn’t have time to write or draw or exercise or meditate or ….

Yet, I digress, back to the video. In the video the narrator talks about that you’re not lazy or unmotivated or a procrastinator. You are afraid. We as humans are motivated to do or not do something. In the video there are several really good quotes and one that made sense to me was by Devon Price a psychology professor. Professor Price said “No one wants to feel incapable, apathetic, or ineffective. If you look at a person’s action (or inaction) and see only laziness, you are missing key details.” This hits home to me. I want to make a difference but my actions are not speaking as loud as I want or need them to. So what key details am I missing about me? What steps can I take to dig deeper and find what I must to be who and what I want in life?

I’m on my path and going within little by little to uncover what I want and why I may be holding myself back from achieving my desires. It’s a step by step process and won’t happen over night but things will happen.

I recommend the video “You’re Not Lazy, Bored, or Unmotivated by: The Art of Improvement” on YouTube.

Is there something you have wanted to do, someplace you’ve wanted to go, or not do but you’re doing it anyway and hate it?

Ask yourself what is holding me back from …? Go within, be honest with yourself and “JUST DO IT” as the Nike Corporation put it so well.

P.S. Thank you to my Sweetheart for caring enough to show me videos or suggest books to help get me back on track, out of a funk and that might get him a dirty look or two. I Love you Nick. “Muah”!